Friday, May 27, 2005

Conversations Lyrics


On the way back from yesterday, give yourself a break
And say hello to the now you know
Now you know (let it go) today
There’s no prison left inside to guard you through

Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
I can tell you’re the one that I’d bet our lives upon

Will it be such a mystery if you leave without a clue?
Don’t let it end on this note again
Just one word shy of true
And we’ll talk more than those behind closed doors will ever know

Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
From a side of my mind that you helped to help me find

Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
Is it clear, can you tell?
Can you feel me just as well?

And we’ll talk more than those behind closed doors will ever know
They’ll never know

Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
I can tell you’re the one that I’d bet our lives upon

Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
Is it clear?
Can you hear me?
Can you feel me just as well?
Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on
Conversations on and on

Hitchcock would be proud...

I just had a bird land on my head and crawl over to my shoulder.

I am not kidding.
It was in front of the Value Village downstairs from the office. I was coming back from the gym and all of a sudden I feel something grabbing my hair and the back of my head. I thought for a second someone had grabbed me, but quickly I saw that it was a very pretty green and red bird as it squawked in my ear and climbed on to my shoulder.

I hear a woman screaming at him behind me "Get over here, Turkey, get over here!" (No kidding, the bird's name was TURKEY!)

It was some kind of medium sized green and red parrot. It stayed on me for a second or two and then flew back to the lady.
I just kept walking and came back to the office.

How bizarre.

It's Poetry baby..

As many of you know I wrote lyrics for a band called Dear John Letters another lifetime ago. For many people that seemed like a weird arrangement. One person wrote the words, the other wrote the song to those words. To a lot of writers that seemed backwards as a good majority of musicians write words to fit melodies already written. Our songs were written to the tune of my poetry. This gave them their own special sound.

These days I don't so much write for anyone but myself and I find a lot of joy in reading lyrics of amazing songs by talented songwriters. I could care less what genre a song lives or if the songwriter or band is considered one of the "cool kids". I like what I like and I hold on tight to those things that resonate within me. It is as simple as that.
I love songs that I don't know anything about, only what they mean to me. It is like they were written for me. I think a successful writer writes something that makes the listener feel as though they visited your head and heart and they know all of your secrets and your deepest most guarded feelings. Sometimes it actually ruins a song to me when I read an interview where the writer tells what the song was about word for word. I need the vague breakdown or none at all. I don't want my opinion colored by their experience. Call me selfish, I don't care.

Some of my favorite lyrics off the top of my head:

In My Life- The Beatles
Hallelujah- Jeff Buckley
Cemetery Song- Jon Auer
Tiny Vessels- Death cab for Cutie
Atlanta (I think that is what it is called) -Capillaries
Jack The Lion- Harvey Danger
Positively 4th street- Bob Dylan
Cold Booded Old Times- Smog
Above you Below me- Badley Drawn Boy
Hurt a Fly- Built To Spill
I May Hate You Sometimes- The Posies
Mental- Eels
Between the Bars- Elliot Smith
I Want You- Elvis Costello
Think (Let Tomorrow Be) - Sebadoh
Legendary & Puzzle- Lou Barlow
Kathy's Song- Simon & Garfunkel
Somebody- Depeche Mode
Love Song- the Cure
Afraid of Women- Dar Williams
Baby Bitch- Ween
and the list goes on and on and on.....

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Where are you now?

Death is such an odd thing.
This week is the first anniversary of loosing my friend Gib. He was such a sweet guy, it is strange for me to think he no longer exists on this planet.
Jon and I got to talking about the big questions last night like "What do you think happens next?"
We come from such different places on this subject. He feels that this is all there is, and that is why me must appreciate life. He isn't closed to the possibility, but he leans towards "This is it"
For me, I HAVE to believe there is something more than this. I've lost so many people that I love that there is an anniversary nearly every month in my world. So many of them were lost to tragedy and long before their time. If I believed that they just vanished from existence, I am not sure I could live with that.
maybe that is the difference between how we believe. He has never really lost anyone close or young or to major tragedy and I have lost many. I have held a person's hand and looked in his face as the life literally left his body. That only happened a couple of years ago and it had a profound effect on me.
That moment when he breathed in and then a gray wash came over him and he just didn't breath out. Like he was holding his breath. I could see the veil of life leave. It was like a shadow passing over him quite literally. It was similar to when I was holding my pets when they passed, just on a much larger level. There was a part of him that left and I watched it leave. I may not have been able to see where it went to, but I did see it, whatever it was. It was not like a light turning out, it was like watching something leave. In my mind, since I watched something leave, that means there had to have been a something there to go, and it had to go somewhere.
It is hard for me to believe with so many people on this planet and with so much death that not everyone has experienced this. Not everyone has had the opportunity to hold a loved ones hand while their soul left their body. It really is a profound thing and for me it was the closest to evidence of the existence of something more. It was tangible, I know what I saw and it sticks with me.

Someone in my house is pregnant....

and her name is Kodo the gerbil.
Last night we caught our gerbils doing "it" There is no doubt about it. It got so graphic I thought I should put on some Barry White and light a few candles for them.
Anyhow, I am sure Kodo is knocked up now, so we will be having some gerbil babies around the end of June. I am thinking by mid July they will be ready to be placed in homes.
I will give them away for free to good homes, so put in your orders now!
I think the pet store said that they would take babies as well.

Now to find a small animal doc that will fix my little boy gerbil so he won't make any more babies! I wonder what that will cost?

Tuesday, May 24, 2005


I drank too much coffee
the drip buzz harshed my espresso mellow
who knew?
Now I want to air drum and stomp my feet
like an ADD office princess
it doesn't help matters that I wore red today.

I am waiting for the paper to come down for me to proof
I hope I can concentrate.
Are typos in?

Must hit the gym after work today to burn off this steam.

I wish certain sounds could be spelled out in words that expressed the true emotion of the sound.

Today I am a Muppet
small feet and all.

Tattoos of you

I have a tattoo on my heart that spells your name.
They could take it away with lasers
but it might stop beating.
They could try
they just might try
But I won't let them

I have a tattoo on my eye of your face.
They could burn it off with acid
but I might go blind
They could try
they just might try
But I won't let them

I am the one who put them there.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

my new hair

here is a shot of my new hair. It isn't the clearest, but it is the best I got right now:

Posie wimmin


Dom, Michelle and Christine

What a long weekend....

It is Sunday morning and here at Auer central it feels like I have not stopped moving since Thursday evening! I am happy to finally not have any place to rush to other than maybe my coffee maker! I feel like I lost 10 pounds this weekend just from the constant motion!

Thursday I already wrote about. Big SIFF Gala, all of my friends looking all spectacular. I should get those photos back today.

Friday afternoon I went to lunch with Jon just following their meeting with their manager where they let her go. Then later that eve there was a show where she was going to be at. I was a little nervous there might be tension, but there wasn’t. (I mean not tension between them, she doesn’t like me, so there was that usual tension there but that is nothing new.) It seems it was an amicable part as everyone seemed to be getting along just fine, so that is good.

My personal feeling is that now they will be able to move forward with someone with the expertise to take them to the next level. I am sure it is difficult to make these types of business decisions when that partner is also your friend, but I think it was the right decision. I feel for everyone involved, but did stay out of it as it is not my place to interject an opinion on the subject.

Friday evening: The benefit went great! We raised $370 for Roy’s class. Not a huge sum of money but better than a bake-sale would have been! There were some extremely talented people and one person who just would not stop playing. I won’t mention names as they all did us a favor by playing, but I will say that it is the first time I had to kick someone off the stage for playing way too long!

One of the parents who sang is married to a guy from King Crimson. I am just listening to her CD this morning and it really is beautiful. She has a very Dar Williams feel to her. Acoustic Folk feel. Her name is Trina Willard. I would love to hear her play sometime in a proper setting.

After the benefit we went over to Darius’s house to say goodbye to Ken and Matt as they were heading out the next day to their different corners of the world until July. Dom and Aden had already left in the morning Ken was on his own and looking like he really missed his little family already. Dom did call and I got a chance to speak with her. She is really a great woman. I totally fell in love with her while she was here and her little Aden. I am looking forward to taking the family to Paris this fall and spending time with them. With everything going on, it felt like I really had not had an opportunity to really talk to Ken until then, so we ended up chatting until the sun came up. It takes a while to get caught up when your friends travel so much! Matt was spinning songs on his I-Pod, he had all of this really rare and interesting stuff from years past. It was all pretty interesting.

Got to bed around 5AM and then had to get up and take Darian to a birthday party for Robb Benson’s daughter Daily. They had an 80’s dance party. The girls were having a great time. I was feeling as though a jackhammer was pounding in my brain.

Jon and I got lost driving around West Seattle, but it was good it gave us a chance to chat.

It is going to be strange to have Jon gone for so long this summer. I know it is necessary but it will still be hard. I just hope loads of people go to the shows and they have much success with it, because then it might be worth it for me loosing precious time with my husband to share him with the rest of the world. (At least that is how it feels from my perspective when faced with months apart.)

We brought the girls home from the party and watched season three of Six Feet Under. Got to bed late and woke up early and that brings us to now.

Whew! What a weekend!

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